Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Can I dress myself?

I am in a confessional mode now (dangerous to a former Catholic!). So I thought I would share something with you all.

As I mentioned, we had Christmas Eve at my sister's and her boy/manfriend. He's in his mid-60's so I want a better phrase to use. Suggestions?

Anyhoo... I was staying at my mom's. Showered, got my hair blown dry (vital that your hair is very dry, before venturing outdoors in Cold Country), dressed and put on my face. So we drove out to A and R's, mom riding shotgun. Along the way she announced that she was not drinking alcohol that night. I replied that I was. I am not a fool - I will not drive if I am impaired. Unfortunately for most women, that limits me to about one drink or glass of wine during an evening - but I do know that and live with that limit.

I had really watched my food intake over the holidays, trying not to overstuff myself on cookies and the like. I thought I had been very successful. However, when I got dressed, I noticed that the waist of my underlovelies (panties, to the rest of you) seemed uncomfortably snug. So I figured that maybe I hadn't been so successful with those calories, after all. Sigh. All that sitting around, I figured.

After some time at A and R's, I had to use the loo. So I went in, shut the door, and dropped trow. Pulled down said underlovelies, and imagine my surprise! They WERE snug - but for a reason. Some idiot had pulled them on sideways - yes, what should have been the waistband was, instead, a leg opening. And when you see that fuzzy little portion of the undies on one of your hips instead of its intended place, you know that something's wrong. So I proceeded to take off the shoes, remove the jeans entirely, put the undies back on in the fashion they were designed to be worn, pull jeans back on and slip shoes on feet again. Somewhere in all of this undressing/redressing activity, I managed to remember just why I had gone in that room originally, so that also was taken care of.

Sometimes it's not easy being me.

4 comments:

Janine said...

Ummmm..... maybe your mother was right?!
:)

jessica said...

Ooooh.... a l-o-o-o-www blow! Thanks for the comment - made me laugh out loud (I really do NOT like the over-used LOL thing-y)! Just got off the phone after many, many minutes with my sister. She is my savior in family matters, as I am hers. We can tell each other anything - and I mean ANYTHING. She lost her husband almost 7 years ago, when she was 52 and her #3 child was a senior in high school. So that helps me relate to things that you are writing about.

Janine said...

Just so you know ..... I'm not even FIFTY yet!!!

:)

Hope you smiled on that one, too (and it's true!).

jessica said...

My sis was (I am thinking back here) about 52 when her hubby died in 2002. With her years of dealing with all that entailed, she was my support (albeit long-distance, except for the service and a few days before that) and still is. Helping me find my way through the woods AND the weeds. This handful of blogging widows is very helpful to me, although I don't have the many "adventures" that you have to blog about (no kids). I always envy you the warmth and support of your family. Yes, even your bull-headed son which provides you with fodder that you probably do not wish to have!